This isn't what I had in mind....

I drove 9 hours to a place I've never been before all by myself to adopt a baby knowing in my heart that I wasn't going to.  Some who read this might think, "what? why did she bother?  Why did she seem so sure that she was going to get him."  I never was, I'm just a good actress sometimes.  You see if I told you to your face that I was going to lose would you have been supportive of me doing it?  Nope.  You would have thought I'm crazy.  But I have to tell those who are reading this that I had to do it.  I was following what I was supposed to do.  I was brought into this crazy situation for a reason and it wasn't to adopt a baby but to be an advocate for a couple of people that have no one to listen to them.  My challenge is to bring together some people and all have them agree what is best for this baby.  And that is remaining exactly where he is, still having the ability to see his biological parents once a week and having access to see his extended family when they chose.  Not with me and far away from all but one family member.  Am I giving up?  No, I was never really trying, just doing what people perceived I was doing.  I was fighting for a baby; what people didn't realize was the different options I was fighting for.  Being with me was only one of the options.  I know I'm rambling and probably not making a lot of sense but the long and the short of it is that I know God didn't want me to have this baby.  He just wanted to make sure I helped ease the situation a bit.  And that is just fine by me.

"mom, how can our house fit in that house....."

For about a month now I have been on the hunt for a house.  I've looked at 5 or 6 and didn't like the layout at all in anything in my price range.  So I dropped my price range and went with something cute and cozy and everyone that sees it says that they can see me in it.  Good sign I would say!
So there is a house that I've always liked.  I liked it years ago before it was renovated and upgraded, now it is even more cute.  So a couple weeks ago I asked my realtor about it.  He said that there was a deal pending on it, so...... I told him that I was very interested and if by chance the deal fell through I would be interested.  He said okay but he didn't think it would.  Then I prayed.  I told God that the house was in his hands and if He wanted me to have the house to just let it happen.  Well 6 days later I got a text. "house deal fell through, when do you want to see it?"  God can move mountains!  So today a verbal offer has been agreed to and the written offer is just needing to be signed.  So it looks like we will be moving!  When I told Jake about it his comment was the title.  How are we going to move our house into the new house?  How innocent.
So the new house has 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, a partial basement with laundry in it, a wood stove, a fully fenced yard and a deck going around 2 sides of the house, and....a walk in closet in the master bedroom!!!
Here it is; cute and cozy and soon to be the new home of Jld and Jake, oh and Gert too!